Episode 12
Healing at the Table: Discovering Family Constellations
Join me, Tricia, as I chat with the incredible Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega about the transformative power of Family Constellations and how they can heal hidden family dynamics. We dive deep into the messy, often chaotic world of family relationships and explore how energy healing can create meaningful shifts that ripple through mealtime interactions and beyond.
Tanya shares her personal journey from a spiritual awakening to becoming an energy healer, highlighting the profound impact these practices can have on our lives and our families. Together, we discuss practical ways to bring more energetic awareness into our daily routines, especially during those hectic mealtimes.
So, whether you're feeling overwhelmed by dinner chaos or seeking deeper connections, this conversation is filled with insights and encouragement to help you find the magic in every meal.
Links referenced in this episode:
You can find more information about Tonia's work at newearthconsciousness.com
We'd love to hear your feedback, questions, and your ah-ha's. Don't hesitate to reach out, and if you feel compelled, please leave a review for the podcast.
Want to hear from me or learn more about my business with Tricia's Bites of LIfe? You can find all the ways, right here: triciasbitesoflife.com/links
Transcript
Hey there and welcome to Mealtime Magic and Mayhem, the podcast that's all about embracing the crazy, messy, and downright chaotic side of family dinners.
Tricia:I'm Tricia, your mealtime mentor and kitchen witch.
Tricia:And let's get one thing straight.
Tricia:This is not your typical how to have a perfect family dinner kind of show.
Tricia:Because honestly, family dinners are rarely perfect.
Tricia:They're loud, they're messy, and half the time someone's crying.
Tricia:And it's not always the kids.
Tricia:But you know what?
Tricia:That's exactly where the magic lives.
Tricia:It's in the burnt toast, the last minute taste takeout, and the nights when you're eating cereal off paper plates.
Tricia:Because it's just life.
Tricia:It's not chasing some Pinterest worthy mealtime fantasy.
Tricia:It's about reclaiming the table for what it really is.
Tricia:A chance to connect, laugh, and maybe spill a little wine along the way.
Tricia:In each episode, we're diving into the nitty gritty of what it means to juggle all the things dinner, kids, work, maybe your own business, and trying not to lose your damn mind.
Tricia:We'll be talking about turning those daily struggles into connection points and finding joy in the mayhem.
Tricia:You'll hear from some badass guests, moms, coaches, experts who know what it's like to be in the thick of it.
Tricia:And they're not afraid to spill their own tea on mealtime disasters.
Tricia:And I'll be right there sharing my truth, my snark, my sarcasm, and probably an embarrassing kitchen story or two.
Tricia:So whether you're hiding in the pantry for a minute of peace, trying to figure out what's for dinner, or just here for a little company, you're in the right place.
Tricia:Let's laugh at the chaos, find the magic, and remind ourselves that mealtime doesn't have to be perfect to be special.
Tricia:Welcome to Mealtime Magic and Mayhem, where the mess is part of the magic and every meal is a new chance to connect or at least survive with your sanity intact.
Tricia:Welcome back to Mealtime Magic and Mayhem.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I'm your host, Tricia, and today we have an incredibly special guest joining us, Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:She's an artist, visionary, energy healer and educator with more than two decades of experience in energy healing.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Tanya's journey has taken her from learning with spiritual masters in India to deep work in non duality and beyond, including her profound Kundalini awakening that brought forth these incredible spiritual gifts.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I think what makes Tanya so powerful is how she uses these gifts from clairvoyance, clairaudience, astral travel, and more to help People heal at a deep soul level, including the transformation of family dynamics.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Her expertise in family constellations is something I know many of you will connect with.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Because we talk so much about mealtime dynamics and mealtime being more than just food.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:It's where the energy of our families really gets to come together for better or worse.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so today we're going to explore how this healing work could transform, you know, not just our lives.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:We're going to talk about some meals and the way that we connect with each other.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Tanya, welcome.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I'm so excited to have you here and dive into this conversation.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I'm so curious to hear more about family constellations once we get into it.
Speaker C:Yeah, definitely.
Speaker C:Thank you so much, Tricia.
Speaker C:I'm excited to be here.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So before we jump into family constellations, I'd love for you to share a bit of your journey.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:You've got such a powerful story from your Kundalini awakening to discovering this plethora of spiritual gifts.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:That's really amazing.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Can you start by telling us a little bit about how you first became involved in energy healing and kind of what led you here?
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:So, you know, in my 20s, I was at UCLA studying fine art.
Speaker C:And through the process of art making, I just naturally started asking these questions of, you know, who am I really?
Speaker C:Like, I started to notice that the mind, that it was this thing and it was like this closed loop, like what's beyond the mind?
Speaker C:You know, like, there's gotta be more, right?
Speaker C:So I started meditating and then I graduated from college and.
Speaker C:And at that point I.
Speaker C:I was noticing I was feeling a little bit depressed graduating from college and like being in the real world and feeling isolated and all this stuff.
Speaker C:And the counselor said, well, you should try yoga.
Speaker C:And I thought, okay, sure, I'm.
Speaker C:Yeah, I'll try yoga, whatever.
Speaker C:So I went and little by little I was, you know, practicing yoga every day and like my body was just opening up and I was like, wow, this is amazing.
Speaker C:And after doing it for a year on my own, I felt drawn to do a yoga teacher training in Canada.
Speaker C:For it was a four week training in Val Marin.
Speaker C:And during, I think maybe it was the third or fourth week of the training, we were.
Speaker C:Everybody got to pick a mantra and so I chose a mantra and I got initiated into the mantra and I took my mantra and I went on my merry way and went into a little meditation hunt and was like, okay, I'm gonna do my mantra right now.
Speaker C:I had a very strong desire for, quote, unquote, enlightenment, you know, and so the.
Speaker C:The drive was very strong.
Speaker C:And so I just remember sitting there, doing my mantra and had this really out of the ordinary experience I'd never experienced in meditation before.
Speaker C:And that was I was feeling my body was getting lighter and lighter, and from the inside, it felt like my.
Speaker C:I could see light filling up my body, and I had this sensation of, like, going higher and higher.
Speaker C:Like, literally like lifting off the ground or something.
Speaker C:I was like, yes, this is it.
Speaker C:I'm going my way to enlightenment.
Speaker C:And then I heard from deep within my ears, this huge growl, like a roar of a lion.
Speaker C:And I was like, Like, I froze.
Speaker C:I freaked out.
Speaker C:And I.
Speaker C:I just shut it down.
Speaker C:I was like, okay, don't know what happened there.
Speaker C:That was weird.
Speaker C:What was that?
Speaker C:Like, holy shit.
Speaker C:Pardon my French.
Speaker C:Didn't know what happened.
Speaker C:Didn't even ask any of the teachers there anything about it.
Speaker C:Like, I don't know why I just kept it to myself.
Speaker C:I mean, I never revealed it to anyone.
Speaker C:And after that, I just started having all kinds of crazy, wild experiences and, you know, things like just having these astral projection experiences, feeling like I was getting electrocuted at night.
Speaker C:I lost a ton of weight.
Speaker C:My hair was falling out.
Speaker C:Like, it was just a horrible ride.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Actually.
Speaker C:It was really.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And this was in your 20s?
Speaker C:In my 20s.
Speaker C:And I had no idea what was happening to me.
Speaker C:It was just like, to me, the experience was like, wow, my body's falling apart, like, suddenly.
Speaker C:I mean, I never had health issues in my entire life.
Speaker C:And all of a sudden, nothing was working.
Speaker C:My.
Speaker C:My menstruation cycle disappeared.
Speaker C:I was like, holy moly.
Speaker C:And.
Speaker C:And so anyway, so that this, this, this ride lasted for two years, and it was excruciating.
Speaker C:Eventually, I did leave the ashram.
Speaker C:Cause I was like, I can't.
Speaker C:I don't know what's going on with me, and I can't stay.
Speaker C:I.
Speaker C:I looked for help.
Speaker C:I went to acupuncturists, I went to naturopaths.
Speaker C:I went to, you know, your regular western medical doctor.
Speaker C:I even went to a psych psychiatrist.
Speaker C:Even was put on meds.
Speaker C:Like, nothing, nothing, nothing worked.
Speaker C:And what it would.
Speaker C:And I'll never forget, there was this one moment, there was a woman that recommended this Reiki master.
Speaker C:She's like, oh, I know someone.
Speaker C:She does Reiki.
Speaker C:She's clairvoyant.
Speaker C:She's really good.
Speaker C:You should go see her.
Speaker C:And I was like, whatever, sure.
Speaker C:Like, I'll try anything, try anything.
Speaker C:And I'll never forget driving in the car and this energy that was in my body was so strong, it was like punching the top of my crown.
Speaker C:Like, it just was like a hammer.
Speaker C:I mean, I couldn't.
Speaker C:If I sat up straight, it was too painful.
Speaker C:So I was like driving hunched over, like, just trying to get to the.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Oh, my gosh.
Speaker C:And anyway, I laid on the table not knowing what the heck to.
Speaker C:I mean, I had no, no idea of anything about energy healing.
Speaker C:And the minute she put her hands on me and I went through the session, it was like just an otherworldly experience.
Speaker C:I just felt like I could finally take a deep breath.
Speaker C:Like the anxiety left.
Speaker C:I just was like, oh, my gosh, what is this?
Speaker C:You know?
Speaker C:And so.
Speaker C:So I worked with her for a long time.
Speaker C:And then, you know, long story short, I met a gentleman who was a devotee of Christ and kind of as a last resort.
Speaker C:And I remember speaking to God in my mind, if there was a God, where's the God God?
Speaker C:This is the last person I'm going to go try and get help from.
Speaker C:And if it doesn't, you know, whatever.
Speaker C:Whatever happens after that, I'm yours.
Speaker C:Like, I surrender.
Speaker C:If this is just going to be my permanent state of being, so be it, right?
Speaker C:And so, so I went and I saw him.
Speaker C:And it was a wild experience.
Speaker C:I mean, there were.
Speaker C:There was a couple of people praying in tongues over me, and I was like, what is this like?
Speaker C:Again, I had no background in Christianity or anything like that.
Speaker C:No connection to Christ whatsoever.
Speaker C:I mean, my mom was a Methodist and I went to church, but I never resonated with anything in.
Speaker C:In the church and so ever felt drawn to it.
Speaker C:So anyway, was there at his home for a couple days, had some profound dreams, laughed for the first time in two years.
Speaker C:I wrote, I'll never forget.
Speaker C:I just started bursting out laughing and came home.
Speaker C:And the next day, all of the anxiety, all the depression, everything was gone completely.
Speaker C:After struggling daily for two solid years, it was.
Speaker C:It was like I came back to life somehow.
Speaker C:And.
Speaker C:And so that just.
Speaker C:That's been my journey.
Speaker C:And so I went and I studied Reiki.
Speaker C:I went on to study other modalities.
Speaker C:And throughout my life in the last 25 years, I've just, you know, I've kind of been following the spiritual breadcrumbs, as I call it, and, yeah, just a variety of different interesting experiences and just felt really called to bring this healing work to people.
Speaker C:And one of the modalities that I.
Speaker C:That I use as family constellations, I found I encountered that about 10 years ago and had such a Profound experience.
Speaker C:I mean, it blew my mind.
Speaker C:What was revealed in the constellation, how these people could know secrets, you know, secrets of family.
Speaker C:And the only reason why those secrets could be validated was that my mom happened to be at the constellation as well, observing.
Speaker C:So it was just.
Speaker C:I was like, wow, this is incredible.
Speaker C:And it was a profound experience.
Speaker C:And so then three years ago, I went into family constellations training and started working with couples and with.
Speaker C:With.
Speaker C:For another family constellator in her program, her relationship programs.
Speaker C:She would.
Speaker C:I would do constellations for her clients.
Speaker C:And then since then, I've been just on my own journey and.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:So the rest is history.
Speaker C:So here I am.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Wow.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So a couple of things that I want to note and honor is one, to go through all that in your 20s had to be terrifying.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so much like we're not even equipped to handle the real world really, yet much less deal with all of that kind of thing.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I can't imagine one, you probably thought, I'm not going to tell anybody about this for.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Because they're going to think I'm nuts.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like, nobody's gonna believe that.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:That's what I heard.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I've already got all this stuff going on, so just getting through that, like, kudos to you.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Cause I just, I can't imagine going through it at that age or imagining my daughter going through that now who's 25 and all the things that you tried.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I also love that you're talking about all these things, energy healing and all these alternative modalities, but you also brought religion into it a bit and like sought that as well.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I feel like so often in society we feel like it's either or that it can't be an and.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so I love that you've tied those two together because I think that's really important.
Speaker C:Yeah, absolutely.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Really, really cool.
Speaker C:I think.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:Especially when it comes to Jesus.
Speaker C:It either people love that or hate that.
Speaker C:I feel like, you know, it's like, see Jesus, then some.
Speaker C:For some people, it's triggering.
Speaker C:They make assumptions perhaps about the person I.
Speaker C:And yeah.
Speaker C:And yet at the same time.
Speaker C:Sure.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Yeah.
Speaker C:There's.
Speaker C:There's.
Speaker C:There's people that follow religion that actually don't know Christ either, you know, so it's.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And then there's people that are deeply devoted to religion that don't understand or believe that energy healing is either real or that it's.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I'm going to say good, for lack of a better word.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So I just, I think that's really, really Cool.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:And I'll tell you, you know, it took me a long time actually to come to terms with it because it's like they're butting heads.
Speaker C:And I'm like, yeah, but it.
Speaker C:Exactly like you said, it's not either or.
Speaker C:And I was in this kind of internal, like, what am I supposed to do?
Speaker C:Like, I know that Reiki was, like, definitely fundamental part of my healing.
Speaker C:And I also know that Christ was as well.
Speaker C:And there is this world of energy can't be denied, you know.
Speaker C:So, yeah, I mean, I guess to each his own, you know, I've had conversations like that with another woman who was.
Speaker C:Grew up in a very fundamentally Christian home.
Speaker C:And she's like, I just started spontaneously recalling past lives, you know, which in.
Speaker C:In the context of her family would have been seen as, like, evil or, you know, whatever.
Speaker C:It would been labeled all these things.
Speaker C:She's.
Speaker C:I just couldn't deny it, you know.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So, yeah, to assume that we understand God's timeline is just insanity to me.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:But we won't get to that today.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So family constellations I find fascinating and such a unique approach to healing.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:For our listeners who might be unfamiliar, can you explain a little bit about what it is and how it helps uncover hidden family dynamics?
Speaker C:Yeah, so it was developed by Bert Hellinger.
Speaker C:You can Google it.
Speaker C:There's a whole body of work, all kinds of practitioners and family constellations that have written many, many books.
Speaker C:So there is a wealth of information that's easy to find, but to describe, it works with the quote, unquote, knowing field.
Speaker C:And so the knowing field is.
Speaker C:It's this energy field.
Speaker C:It's, you know, it could be called other different, other things, such as the unified field of consciousness.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Or would you call it another dimension, so to speak?
Speaker C:Well, it.
Speaker C:It is the dimension of energy.
Speaker C:And so the reality is, we all know now, according to quantum physics and Albert Einstein, right, Like, energy doesn't disappear.
Speaker C:It doesn't disappear.
Speaker C:So everything that has ever happened in the past or has the potential to happen in the future is all right here, right now.
Speaker C:And so when you come.
Speaker C:So let's say a client comes, and their issue is I have a tendency to attract the wrong relationships.
Speaker C:I just repeatedly end up in abusive relationships.
Speaker C:I don't understand.
Speaker C:Why does this keep happening to me?
Speaker C:And so then, without knowing, going into the story, I don't have to hear like, oh, well, you know, John did this to me, and then it was Steve, and then it was this, and, you know, going into the.
Speaker C:All of it, and, oh, my father was a terrible man.
Speaker C:And all the, all the things, all the opinions, I'll just say, okay, great, so you're struggling relationship.
Speaker C:Your intention is what?
Speaker C:Well, I want to really, I want to attract a loving partner.
Speaker C:Okay, so let's look and see what's there.
Speaker C:So, and if it's a workshop format where it's a group of people, it can happen within a group of people, or it can be one on one.
Speaker C:If it's a group, I would then say, okay, so look at the people sitting here.
Speaker C:Choose someone to be you choose another person to be your father and another person to be your mother.
Speaker C:And we start there.
Speaker C:So once those people come into the circle representing those people that they know nothing about, they have no, no backstory, nothing.
Speaker C:They step into the field and things just start happening.
Speaker C:The.
Speaker C:The client will place those people in a certain way, and then I'll start asking, okay, you, who's representing the client?
Speaker C:What are you feeling right now?
Speaker C:They might say, wow, I'm noticing, I'm feeling really nervous.
Speaker C:My heart is racing.
Speaker C:I can't look at my mother.
Speaker C:Things like that.
Speaker C:And then I'll go, what is the mother feeling?
Speaker C:And then they'll say something, and what is the father feeling?
Speaker C:And so these people that have no connection to the client or her history will just start speaking and sharing things.
Speaker C:And oftentimes the client, well, I would say 99% of the time, the client's like, yep, that's spot on.
Speaker C:It's exactly something my mother would say.
Speaker C:Or, yep, this totally makes sense.
Speaker C:And so then we start to just utilize what's called healing sentences.
Speaker C:And so it's always focused on the truth.
Speaker C:So me as a facilitator, I don't.
Speaker C:I cannot have an agenda.
Speaker C:I can't say, okay, I'm gonna make this work.
Speaker C:You know, everybody can get along.
Speaker C:You know, it's really about, okay, well, what's true here?
Speaker C:So say with the daughter in that situation.
Speaker C:I would say to her, okay, so turn to your mother if she's able to, and just say to her, when I look at you, I feel afraid.
Speaker C:I'm your daughter.
Speaker C:You are my mother.
Speaker C:When I look at you, I feel afraid.
Speaker C:And then wait to see how the mother responds.
Speaker C:And so oftentimes we'll see a dynamic that's playing out where the client's carrying something that's not theirs.
Speaker C:So let's say that somehow the client, maybe she was in between mother and father, and she was involved in their relationship as a child.
Speaker C:Well, that's definitely gonna impact your future.
Speaker C:Relationships, you know, so giving back their relationship to them, like your relationship is yours.
Speaker C:It's none of my business.
Speaker C:I'm just the child.
Speaker C:Like, that would be an example.
Speaker C:And so what happens is that these organic movements, call them movements of the soul, are to happen and slowly, eventually, the, The.
Speaker C:The orders of love, quote, unquote, get restored.
Speaker C:So to where the client is the child, her parents are standing behind her, the father's on the right, mother's on the left supporting her, et cetera.
Speaker C:And maybe there's.
Speaker C:We might have to bring in their grandparents or, you know, and maybe there's things that happen to the family that I might just ask her, like, were there any untimely deaths?
Speaker C:Are there any family secrets that you know of?
Speaker C:Like, and so the field will just start to move and reveal.
Speaker C:And so it can be very cathartic.
Speaker C:And eventually the constellation will move until it's resolved, until it's like, okay, this is as far as it wants to go.
Speaker C:And ideally, the client, by the end, just feels at peace.
Speaker C:You know, they're.
Speaker C:I'll feel the anxiety or the tension or whatever it is.
Speaker C:They're able to give back these energies that don't belong to them.
Speaker C:And so.
Speaker C:And sometimes if they're, let's say they're giving something back to their mother that didn't belong, let's say the mother was an alcoholic or something, and the child had to be the big one and the mother had to be the little one.
Speaker C:Well, that's.
Speaker C:That's a dis.
Speaker C:That's a disorder in.
Speaker C:In the orders of love.
Speaker C:So you would have her say the healing sentence of, I'm supposed to be the big little one.
Speaker C:You're supposed to be the big one.
Speaker C:Okay, Give this back to you.
Speaker C:Like I give back your, Your rage or your anger or whatever it is.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So it's a.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:It's another modality that can be used to really do that, that inner child healing of the things that we carry with us.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So interesting.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:You know, in.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:In this podcast, we talk a lot about chaos and connection that happens around family meals, good and bad.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so I talk to a lot of women who I've had everything from.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I don't like to cook because that's a role that was expected of me.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Again, bringing these things in that they are.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:They're either not theirs, maybe, or that they learned or watched in childhood or from a previous abusive relationship where this was an expectation.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so it's really interesting to hear.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I've never thought about energy healing in, in that way.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I always think of having a hard time finding the right words.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:You know, I've done some timeline therapy and some, you know, different, different modalities of energy healing.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I just find this one incredibly fascinating.
Speaker C:Yeah, it's very dynamic.
Speaker C:And, and when it's done in a group, oftentimes the people that are the representatives, it's uncanny the roles that they get assigned to play.
Speaker C:Because somehow it's like it's relevant to them in their life.
Speaker C:Even though not about them.
Speaker C:They'll receive some kind of medicine for themselves as well.
Speaker C:Because for whatever reason, that role is touching upon something within them that they need to heal.
Speaker C:And so what can happen after a constellation is that things just start to spontaneously shift.
Speaker C:So, like, in the context of the family meal, let's say one of those members went and got a family constellation.
Speaker C:Because they're whatever, they're in conflict with one of the other members of the family.
Speaker C:And they do work around that.
Speaker C:And they have that internal shift.
Speaker C:The dynamics change.
Speaker C:So the next time they have the meal with Uncle Bother and Sally or whoever, it's like, oh, wow, things are different from yesterday.
Speaker C:We're having that, that argument that we always tend to have when something is let go of.
Speaker C:So, yeah, it, it not only impacts the individual, it's just the, it's, it's, it's the reality of quantum physics when you.
Speaker C:Because we're all connected and we're all one.
Speaker C:If you change and you heal something in yourself, it's gonna ripple out starting you.
Speaker C:And then the people that are closest to you and on so on.
Speaker C:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Yeah.
Speaker C:That's the beauty of it.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Yeah.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So true.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So true.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I mean, so much of my story is realizing that I really was.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I was blaming my husband and my kids and my job for everything that I felt like made meal time stressful.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And it was me realizing I was a good chunk of the problem.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And the energy and the intention that I was bringing to it.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so shifting that changed everything for me.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Which in turn changed everything for my family dynamic and how we communicate.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Hence where we are today.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so I love learning about these different modalities.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And sharing them with my listeners.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Because there's so many ways to get the healing that you need or to change your circumstances.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so this I, I, this family constellations talking to you is the first time that I had heard about it.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And when I was like constellations, I was thinking, like, you know, like stars and astrology and whatnot.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And so it's been so interesting to learn more about it from you, many of our listeners, and our busy moms, entrepreneurs.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:They're juggling a lot.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And how.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:How would you say they can begin to bring more energetic awareness into their daily routines?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I would say, even if it comes especially to family meal time, because you deal in a lot of modalities, what are some simple practices you would recommend they can start using?
Speaker C:Oh, wow.
Speaker C:So, yeah, I.
Speaker C:Yes, mothers are juggling a lot.
Speaker C:We have so many demands on us, you know, having to take.
Speaker C:Run the household, the kids, the job, everything.
Speaker C:And yeah, it's really easy to get overwhelmed and stressed out and get into that snowball effect.
Speaker C:I think it really.
Speaker C:It.
Speaker C:The most important thing is.
Speaker C:I mean, I guess I don't necess.
Speaker C:Well, honestly, the easiest thing to do.
Speaker C:That I have found that helps me to.
Speaker C:When the mind starts to get wound up pretty tight and we find ourselves constantly in that thinking and like on that treadmill and obsessing about things and so on and so forth, to stop for a moment and just like, sit.
Speaker C:If you can sit outside nature, great.
Speaker C:Just sitting on a meditation cushion, closing your eyes and just breathing in deeply and connecting to your body and just.
Speaker C:Just observing the mind and not getting attached to the thoughts.
Speaker C:And once you start to develop more and more of that awareness, you can catch yourself when in those moments where you want to be reactive to go, wait a minute, I don't have to react.
Speaker C:I can choose not to react right now and let it go.
Speaker C:And it's amazing how quickly your energy body will reorient.
Speaker C:So, for example, I observed it in myself the other day.
Speaker C:I was sitting with my husband.
Speaker C:He was talking to another guy.
Speaker C:We were in like a group call, whatever, and.
Speaker C:And there was this kind of this energy around, like, you know, two guys and a lady.
Speaker C:Like, you know, there was a little bit of.
Speaker C:I don't know how else to say, and not that they were inappropriate, but it was kind of like locker talk or something.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like a little bit of that bromance, kind of that whole bro, bro vibe.
Speaker C:Yeah, I'm like.
Speaker C:Felt like I was being talked down to or something like that and got off the call.
Speaker C:And I.
Speaker C:I could feel within myself going, like, I'm, you know, I'm gonna have a talk with my husband and set him straight and, like, shake my finger at him.
Speaker C:And the minute I felt that arising within myself, I asked the question.
Speaker C:I'm like, who's the one that's upset?
Speaker C:Like, who is the one that is upset in this moment?
Speaker C:And then I caught it, and I realized I was like, oh, it's just my.
Speaker C:It's the ego.
Speaker C:It's just the ego wants to be right.
Speaker C:The ego wants to prove a point, you know?
Speaker C:And so in that moment, it's like, oh, actually, who I.
Speaker C:Because I know who I really am.
Speaker C:I don't have to be upset by this.
Speaker C:Like, whatever.
Speaker C:It's their thing, you know what I mean?
Speaker C:I don't have to take anything personally.
Speaker C:I mean, so I.
Speaker C:I guess that's just the example.
Speaker C:I mean, mindfulness really is.
Speaker C:Is.
Speaker C:Is so important.
Speaker C:So.
Speaker C:And I think it.
Speaker C:Again, it just takes practice.
Speaker C:Because if you're not.
Speaker C:If you have a habit of always being in the overdoing and the overthinking and the stressing out, you know, rushing to make the meal and yelling at your kid because they're running late for the bus and all the thing just to.
Speaker C:Okay, like, it's not the end of the world.
Speaker C:Things can take their own time.
Speaker C:I don't have to force anything to happen here, you know, and at times, it can be a little bit disruptive to the ego because the ego's used to being in control and want to dictate what happens or doesn't happen.
Speaker C:And so sometimes when you do create for that spaciousness for yourself, the ego might try to creep back in.
Speaker C:Like, it's not supposed to be this easy, you know, like, you should be doing more.
Speaker C:You should be stressed out.
Speaker C:Why are you not stressed out?
Speaker C:Means something's wrong, like you're missing something.
Speaker C:You know, all those things.
Speaker C:So just.
Speaker C:So just.
Speaker C:Just to observe your thoughts.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:Be detested.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Yeah.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:It really.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I do really think it's about learning to let go of some of that and really asking yourself, why am I so hellbent on controlling this right now?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:What does that mean to me?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Something like, really mean, Is it important?
Speaker C:Yeah.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And if it is, then by all means, go for it.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like, if you're talking about, you know, getting your children to take their meds or whatever, like, I get it now, but if it's, you know, did they.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Did you get the right thing in the lunchbox?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I'm pretty sure they'll live.
Speaker C:Yes.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:They'll figure it out.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:They'll figure it out.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I love those tips.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I love those tips.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:You've worked with so many individuals and families, and I know you have to have seen some incredible transformations.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Can you give us a story?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Obviously not sharing anything, you know, confidential names or anything.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Share a story or an example of a family.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Whose dynamics did you remember?
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Most that were healed through family Constellations.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like, I just want the listeners to be, to latch onto something that they can really relate to.
Speaker C:Right, yeah, I'll pick one.
Speaker C:There's a woman that worked with me for.
Speaker C:It was six sessions every other week.
Speaker C:We met and went through all of her, all of the sticking points that she, or you know, the, the challenges that she was facing.
Speaker C:And one of the major ones was that she didn't, she was, she had a partner of 10 years, they weren't technically married, but she felt really stuck.
Speaker C:Didn't know whether, whether she was supposed to stay or go.
Speaker C:The relationship was unsatisfying, yet they've been together for so long.
Speaker C:And part of her really wants to be a mother and just, just didn't know what to do.
Speaker C:Just, you know, constantly doubting, constantly.
Speaker C:Just, yeah, just.
Speaker C:I mean, you can imagine being in that scenario, like, yeah, stuck.
Speaker C:I don't know if I'm supposed to stay.
Speaker C:Like, nothing's happening.
Speaker C:I'm just kind of here and it's just, ugh.
Speaker C:And so we, we did the constellations.
Speaker C:She loved the work.
Speaker C:They were very eye opening for her.
Speaker C:And I would say about three months later, I think it was about maybe four months later, I just thought about circling back to her, just checking in, like, how's, how's everything going?
Speaker C:You know, how are things?
Speaker C:She says, oh my gosh, so much has happened.
Speaker C:She said, I eventually told my partner, I asked lovingly for a separation.
Speaker C:And subsequently he decided to go into counseling.
Speaker C:And I'm finally the relationship, I'm finally having the relationship I've always wanted to have with him and I'm pregnant and I'm going to have a baby.
Speaker C:So it was just like, it was just so interesting because for.
Speaker C:It sounded to me that for the, for something to change, she couldn't just stay in the.
Speaker C:I don't know.
Speaker C:And she had to make a bold move which was, okay, I'm going to ask for separation.
Speaker C:Boom.
Speaker C:And then that's.
Speaker C:Everything changed after that.
Speaker C:Another quick example was one of the more profound ones, was a mother who came to me really distraught.
Speaker C:Her son, her 20 year old son was hooked on meth, who was refusing treatment, telling her, I'm fine, it's under control, I don't need your help, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker C:So now we couldn't do a constellation for him.
Speaker C:Cause he's already an adult, we'd have to ask for permission, et cetera.
Speaker C:Well, we can't do it for him, but I can do one for you.
Speaker C:So we did and we were able to see that There was this hidden loyalty between him and the grandpa who was an addict of sorts.
Speaker C:I think he was an alcoholic.
Speaker C:And the dynamic of this, her child being the youngest, trained to be the big guy.
Speaker C:And anyway, it was just really interesting and it was very helpful to her to know what she had to let go of.
Speaker C:Two weeks later she emailed me and said, my son decided to go into rehab on his own accord.
Speaker C:Like everything has changed.
Speaker C:We as a family are going into.
Speaker C:I think they did some kind of either AA group or narcotics anonymous group or something that as a family to.
Speaker C:To.
Speaker C:To work on their stuff.
Speaker C:Because anytime.
Speaker C:And I don't know if you might already know, but anytime there's someone that's suffering from addiction, it's definitely an issue of belonging.
Speaker C:And they are the ones that are kind of waving the red flag saying, there is a familial problem here.
Speaker C:It's not just me, but I'm the one that's dealing with the symptoms of the family dysfunction.
Speaker C:So it's never just the one person.
Speaker C:So it was beautiful to see that they all came together and realized like, we as a family need to.
Speaker C:To work on our dynamics.
Speaker C:So that was like, mind blowing.
Speaker C:It was really amazing.
Speaker C:And there's also.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:Many stories you can read about them.
Speaker C:Other.
Speaker C:Other consulators talk about them all the time.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Awesome.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I just.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I mean, the examples you've given are very profound.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I absolutely.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I've already said it multiple times, but I just don't have another word.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like, I just love how your work can create such deep shifts, whether that's for one person or families, because that one shift and that one person can create such a ripple in an entire family, as you've pointed out.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I know a lot of listeners may be eager to learn more and experience it for themselves.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So if you could share how people can get in touch with you, how they can work with you.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And do you have anything exciting coming up you want to talk about?
Speaker C:Sure, you can find me at newearth consciousness.
Speaker C:Com.
Speaker C:I'm on Facebook as Tanya Elena.
Speaker C:If you go to my website and you sign up to my email list, I often host free family constellation demonstration workshops on Zoom.
Speaker C:So that's an opportunity that you can join for free and participate or just observe or even receive a constellation for yourself to see what it's like.
Speaker C:Because it's definitely.
Speaker C:Family constellations is one of those modalities that you have to experience in order to really understand what it is.
Speaker C:Because explaining it, it's just, you know, it's hard to Imagine, because it is a felt experience.
Speaker C:And so.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Well, you just, you just blew my mind with the fact that you can do it on Zoom.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Like, in my head, I had it just like worked out that you had to be in person where you could like, you know, be in the same room.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And I think we forget that energy travels faster than light and we can do these things via zoom.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Didn't even occur to me.
Speaker C:Yeah, and that was just.
Speaker C:I mean, Covid made that happen, but it was previous to that.
Speaker C:I think all family constellators did everything in person.
Speaker C:And then when Covid came, it was like, oh, wait, let's experiment.
Speaker C:And so they did and found that it worked out just as well.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And probably the people needed it the most because they were all stuck at home to get blue.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Right.
Speaker C:Totally.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:And then, you know, when it's one on one, it's.
Speaker C:There's several ways of doing it.
Speaker C:But I guide the client in order to sense into the field all the different characters.
Speaker C:So you can, as the client, you can feel, oh, what's happening with mother, what's happening with father.
Speaker C:You'll.
Speaker C:You'll feel it in your body.
Speaker C:And so it's very empowering to know that, that, that, that you have, that we all have.
Speaker C:We all have intuitive abilities and we all have the ability to sense.
Speaker C:And that's the thing, like most people think, like, oh, you must be a psychic or you must have some kind of special powers.
Speaker C:And it's like, no, really, any.
Speaker C:Anybody who I would say is inclined to sensing energy, to, you know, feeling with their whole body can do this kind of work.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:So, yeah, I believe we all have those gifts.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:It's just a matter of uncovering enough one, wanting to, I mean, realizing that you might have them and wanting to lean into them.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:But I.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I truly believe we all have them.
Speaker C:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker C:So, so yeah, just sign up for my newsletter and you'll.
Speaker C:You'll get the.
Speaker C:All the updates and offers and things like that.
Speaker C:And I think on my landing page, there's also a free meditation you can sign up for and receive if you.
Speaker C:If you'd like.
Speaker C:Great.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Thank you so much, Tanya, for sharing your wisdom and insights with us today.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:I think the idea of healing our family dynamics at a soul level and how the ripple effect that that can create even into small everyday moments, you know, like mealtime, and then you even think even bigger ripples into things like dealing with a child with addiction, like, so incredibly powerful.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:It gives me goosebumps for anyone listening.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:If you want to, you know, really look into Tanya's work.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:All our links are going to be in the show notes for you to check out, so be sure to check those out.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:And if you've enjoyed today's episode, don't forget to subscribe.
Tanya Elena Gonzalez Ortega:Leave us a review and share it with someone who could use a little more magic in their mealtime.
Tricia:And that's a wrap on today's episode of Mealtime Magic and Mayhem.
Tricia:I hope you're feeling a little more ready to tackle the dinner chaos and find some magic in the everyday.
Tricia:If you've enjoyed this episode, I'd love it if you could take a quick minute to leave a review on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or wherever you're listening.
Tricia:You're feedback helps this show reach more amazing women just like you.
Tricia:It totally makes my day to hear what's resonating with you.
Tricia:Until next time, keep finding those sparks of joy around the table.
Tricia:Thanks for listening and I'll catch you in the next episode.
